The Girly Girl's Guide to Camping: Choosing a plot/Pitching a tent

Depending on the campsite, you might be allowed to pick your plot, and that my friends, is serious business. There are a lot of things to consider:

• Proximity to the sanitaires
• Ground quality
• Trees/Bushes
• Neighbours.

Proximity to the toilets is an obvious one, you want to be close enough that a 4am dash to pee in the rain isn’t a harrowing thought. Although you don’t wanna be too close, else you might have a constant stream of fat frenchmen in speedos trapsing past at 6am before you’ve even had a coffee to settle your stomach.

The rest of the things you need to consider I think are skills you pick up over time, but it’ll try to help a little: Not picking a rocky plot is an obvious one, as is not picking a slopey one, hard ground is good, solid ground isn’t, trees will provide shelter from the sun, but are annoying if it’s windy or raining, but they could help you out up a washing line, or a hammock. And when it comes to neighbours….well. Most campers are the same, we’re friendly folk who like a drink, and a chat in stunted french, and being quiet and chill, but there are often school groups camping, and if you can help it steer clear of them, they are prone to loudness.

Now, if you’ve never pitched a tent before, it could be tough, even if it’s an easy pop-up one, all tents are different so I cant help you with that but I can say, wear shoes with a solid sole so you can stomp the pegs in instead of using a mallet, and guy ropes are SERIOUS BUSINESS. Peg ‘em out wide, and look carefully when you’re walking around your plot….my guy rope and tent peg injuries are in the 100s.